Drunk Beat
by J Luc Pitard
Summary: Ren Tsuruga was having a bad day. A bad day that led to a drunken night. A drunken night that leads to... Definitely rated M. Lemons and bad language from good characters.
1. Prologue

Yes, this is another lemon fic. No, Confessions isn't done but neither is it dropped. This one is being posted in parts, but is *nearly* finished. No, I don't own Skip!Beat, nor the characters in this fan fic. This is just for the viewing pleasure of fans and not for profit.

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Ren Tsuruga was having a bad day.

One of many lately, but most were manageable, thanks to his good luck charm. Today had been a particularly rough day of filming. For this one, he'd deliberately set himself at odds with the rest of the cast; it was a role within a role. He was Cain Heel, a foreign born actor brought in to play the killer, BJ. Truth be told, Cain was closer to who Ren used to be than he liked to admit and that made it harder to get back to the self he'd been cultivating since arriving on Japanese soil some five years ago. The scenes he'd had today and the reactions of the other actors hit him harder than normal but it was made worse when he'd left the set and found his good luck charm- the actress playing Cain's sister- gone! Sick to death that someone had taken her to get back at him, he'd called LME, but no one would talk to him about it, only giving him the run around until a condescending secretary's, "Not to worry, Mr. Tsuruga, she had a standing job and will be back tomorrow morning, in time for your filming."

Fuck!

That could only mean she was with that bastard and she didn't want Ren to know. He stalked across their hotel room to the half empty glass he'd left on the table, cussed again and grabbed an equally half-empty bottle, taking a long swig. He wouldn't need this foul sedative, not if she was here. There was no manager to turn to, not for Cain Heel, just one sexy-as-hell little sister. Setsuka.

"Sweet, wet dreams, Big Brother," he laughed to himself and took another swig. Finding the bottle now empty, he rose and staggered toward the mini-fridge. It was near the area she cooked in, so he usually ignored it, but maybe it would have some of those little bottles?

"Score!" He cheered in English and proceeded to grab a handful before swaggering out to the balcony. Scotch, whiskey, sake, gin, rum, vodka- no, gotta avoid the vodka. Kicks like a fucking mule in the morning, he thought. Fucking, naïve girl! He'd tried to tow the straight and narrow around her, even within his character's wild ways. But without her? He drank, lining up and knocking over his little soldiers as he sat outside, back against the cool, metal railing. Leather pants kept him from feeling the chill of the concrete but his unbuttoned shirt did nothing to keep him warm.

"Fuck it," he said, picking up the miniature vodka. Plink, plink, plink, they went. As he ran out of bottles, his vision blurred and he became a truly angry drunk. Why wouldn't they goddam tell him where she was?! Why hadn't she trusted him enough to tell him herself? Did she see him as a fucking monster?! That smarmy bastard could see her, could touch her, bastard could throw her away again?! Ren was the one who should be beside her, dammit! He was the one who loved her! Glass bottles broke under fists, one by one. Plink, smash! Plink, smash! He heard someone trying the door handle and stilled. Burglar? Hotels were rife with crime, but it was an unlucky burglar who came into his room tonight!


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1, as it were. I don't own Skip!Beat, nor the characters in this fan fic. This is just for the viewing pleasure of fans and not for profit.

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Coming in late from Bridge Rock, she wanted to be careful not to wake him, so Kyouko was sneaking in, like the proverbial "thief in the night." She would've handed today's job off to her substitute, but the guys- and even the producer- insisted that only she would do for this live, season ending episode. Bo worked harder than ever and it had been really fun! So much fun, that she even went out afterward for a snack with the boys. Now she was exhausted but didn't want to go back to her own room above the Darumaya, needing instead to check on her... what? Could she still think of him as her mentor in the industry? A sibling, perhaps? Setsu might could do that, but Kyouko's feelings weren't those of a sister, that much she knew! And would a junior at work be unable to rest if she couldn't see her senior's sleeping face? Heavens, she'd fallen back into being a despicable, desperate woman ever since she'd realized...

Mr. Tsuruga must've fallen asleep with a lamp on, she thought, and as she eased the door open a crack; she could also see the light from the open mini-fridge spilling into the kitchen. Had he eaten only snacks for dinner? Typical! Quietly, she edged the door open further, to look over at the two Western beds, but something hit up against her and suddenly, she was sent flying!

A soft bed stopped her, but it was still a hard landing and, for a moment, she had the wind knocked out of her. Her assailant calmly closed the door, locking it and even the extra security measures the room had, before slowly turning toward her. Oh shit, she thought, fearful- both of him and for him.

"Who do you think you are, bastard," he said, in the coarsest slang he knew. "Breaking into my room?" It was taking him a while to focus on the young boy in a track suit across from him. A wide sweatband held back short, reddish hair and his eyes... her eyes? Kyouko's eyes? Damn, I'm hallucinating, he thought.

"Your hands..." she gasped as soon as she found her breath again. He held up bloody fists and there was a smear of his blood across the back of the door. It surprised him, since he hadn't felt anything. He shook them and tiny shards of glass glinted as they flew to the carpet. He held his hands up and stared at them again, then back at the door, swaying in the process. Kyouko looked around for something to treat them with. "Hold on," she said and rose to get ice or towels, but his voice stopped her.

"No," his voice commanded. "Lick it. You lick it. Make it feel better."

It was as if the world spiraled down in slow motion, the Emperor of the Night was facing her, but his words didn't make sense. Still, she stepped forward rather than toward the bath or the kitchen.

"Mr. Tsuruga," she said hesitantly, her own hands held out in front of her, empty palms held up in supplication. "We need to clean your wounds," she said, as if talking with a young child. She'd prided herself on being able to handle and redirect drunks since she was a young girl working at the inn. They usually forgot the stupid and often cruel things they did once they'd sobered up, so the trick was to try and be patient, wait it out, without letting them get too out of control.

"Lick it," he snarled. "Or maybe you'd rather lick something else?"

That got her moving toward him again, although she slowed down once she reached his fists, confused, scared. Ren towered over her, still not making any sense. He thrust one hand at her. She tried again, "Do you know who I am, Mr. Tsuruga? I'll go get you some antiseptic and then we can talk, okay?"

He glared at her with light colored, hazy eyes. "I know who you are, it's you... you don't know who the fuck I am!" he roared. "Clean this. I want your tongue on me, now!" His right index finger wavered in front of her lips. With a closer look, she could see that the wounds were along the sides of his hands, and only traces of blood had dripped to his fingertips, but it was clear he wouldn't listen to reason. She tightened her lips and shook her head quickly, from side to side. A heavy weight settled on her right shoulder and she watched as he moved his other hand- in painfully slow motion- first toward her mouth, and then downward, settling it on the large silver belt buckle that held black pants on his too slim hips. She looked back up at his half shadowed face. The threat was implicit.

"This is my fantasy," he told her. "You do as I say."

Kyouko licked her lips and then swallowed hard. His eyes... was that really Mr. Tsuruga? She scanned his facial features, bone structure. There was no doubt. When she'd first seen him in character as Cain Heel, she'd felt that he was somehow familiar, for someone so foreign. Now he felt foreign, for someone so familiar. Shaking fingers reached for the hand at his waist. He let her lift it to her mouth and closed his eyes as her tongue snaked out to tentatively taste the tip of his thumb, the least messy one.

She serviced him in this dream, exactly like he'd always imagined she would, starting out businesslike and then beginning to get into it. He moaned as she took his middle finger into her warm mouth, up to his first knuckle. He'd been determined not to react, but the hand on her shoulder shifted so that his long fingers could caress her neck, encouraging her take more. In and out, she drew his digits and he closed his eyes, enjoying the sensations. She bent his wrist to lick his palm and he thought he'd lose it right then, but when she moved her tongue over the cuts, she made him cry out. Pleasure and pain overloaded. He pulled his hand away and found himself breathing harder.

Likewise, her voice was ragged as she said, "See? Let me take you to the sink, clean them properly."

"No," he rasped and swayed before her, now putting his other hand in front of her and moving to hold her around the waist. Once he was stabilized, he closed his eyes and waited for the warmth to come. She did not disappoint. Sighing, she began to lick his hand like a lollipop. Even within this fantasy, he was already fantasizing about more. Soon there were soft sounds from both of them and he was drawing her closer.

"Kyouko," he whispered, resting his forehead on the crown of her head.

"Mmhmm?" she murmured from around his left-hand pinky.

"I wanna fuck you," he said, his voice still whisper soft.

"EH!"


	3. Chapter 2

I don't own Skip!Beat, nor the characters in this fan fic. This is just for the viewing pleasure of fans and not for profit.

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Kyouko's brain was in overdrive, a panicked look across her face. The scent of alcohol was nearly overpowering with his face this close. He couldn't... SHE couldn't... her brain was in danger of frying as censored images flitted by. Most were from her imagination, but some were garnered from her time living in the same hotel room with such a sexy man- sleeping, undressing, bathing- Oh no!

The smell of alcohol was strangely erotic, or maybe that was him? She tried to focus on his face, his eyes. Covered as they were by shadows and hair, she could still see that these weren't the eyes of her idolized workmate. For one thing their color was wrong. Dark hair fell about eyes that were to the blue side of hazel. You can do a lot of things with contact lenses and she knew for a fact that he wore them for his role as Cain Heel, but the eyes that bore into hers now were unknown to her. It wasn't only their shade. This reminded her of that time he was fevered and not fully himself. Back then- moments from being fully passed out- he'd responded to words of memorized dialog. Would the unscripted Heel siblings be able to pull him from this craziness?

"You've been drinking, big brother," Kyouko growled in English, then added a sultry pleading tone to her voice, "I won't play with you until you sober up! Please?" Her lower lip trembled, half in character and half in fear that he might not rouse out of this... Please, please work, she chanted to herself.

Laughter rang out in the room. A welcome change from the cursing that had filled it in the hours prior, but equally as shocking. Straightening up, Ren flicked her forehead. Who was this girl kidding? "A definite NG," he laughed. "Cain's little sister wouldn't be caught dead in those clothes!"

Her eyes widened and her face flushed, first with embarrassment and then with anger. She pushed away from him and managed to turn sideways before he crushed her close.

"So, why don't we take them off, then?" His sultry voice poured into her ear and her knees went weak. She fought the urge to comply all by herself. Co-star killer, indeed! She'd thought to use acting to sober him but instead was in danger of being lost within his scene. Sloppy kisses along the right side of her neck derailed her train of thought. Teeth caressed her skin gently. She wanted to know what came next. Was this only because he was drunk? She wrestled with her inner demons.

"My first time," she said carefully to the room. "Was to follow my first kiss- on my wedding night. This-" she stopped as he hummed in her ear. With a push, she dislodged his head, but he still held her tightly, rough cheek rubbing alongside hers.

"This?" His amusement rumbled through her back.

"Sex," she clarified. "It's supposed to be with someone you love, Mr. Tsuruga."

"Mmmm." Ren nodded sagely, then nibbled her ear, whispering, "I love you."

Rage demons swirled around the girl, held helpless in his grasp. Though she faced away from him, he could feel the anger like a power surge. He feared to hold her, but also to let her go. Finally, the hairs on the back of his neck went down and he loosened his grip. Something had happened, but his fogged brain couldn't quite follow her mood shifts.

"No," she said in a quiet voice. "No, you don't, Mr. Tsuruga. You love a cute, clueless, high schooler that you won't let yourself be with- for some strange and probably very sad reason." His arms fell slack and she turned to face him, feet spread apart and head held high. "But I am an actress. If you tell me what she's like, I can act like her." She reached up and put her hands on either side of his face, searching for anything beyond the confused knit to his brows. "For you," she said and on tip toes she pulled his face the last inch to place a quick kiss on his lips. She smiled a service industry smile to hide the twist in her gut from his shocked expression.

Dreaming? A drunken fantasy? Ren was pretty sure this must be both. She'd kissed him. Full on the lips. Kyouko. His Kyouko. She was in front of him, touching him- willingly. He leaned in again, trying to duplicate her innocent brush, but missing somehow and smooching her nose instead. It was embarrassing, how much he lacked in the suave department right now. Got to pull it together!

"Please?" she asked. Ren nodded his head, unsure exactly what they'd been talking about. Kyouko moved to hug him and spoke to the bare skin on his chest, sending waves of pleasure with each breath, "What's she like? The girl you love?"

He could get used to this new Kyouko, Ren thought. Wrapping his arms around her body, he wondered how to describe her. "An idiot," he said, kissing the crown of her head. There was a trace of sweat on the fabric around her head. Time for that to go. "Intelligent," he added, pulling her hair band off and then ruffling her dyed locks. "Crazy." He ran his hand down her back and felt her shudder against him. "Innocent." He felt her nod and took it for agreement so he pinched her ass. "Sexy," he growled into her hair and she slapped his bicep weakly in retaliation. Since when had his Kyouko ever been this obedient? Definitely a dream, he decided and tried to lift her up so he could kiss her lips, but he staggered, causing her to shriek and jump away slightly. Worried she'd run, Ren took her arm and twirled her so she fell onto the nearest bed- hers, as it turned out- looking up at him. Pleased with himself, he moved over top of her and smiled. "Beautiful," he sighed down at her.

If she weren't already on her back, Kyouko might've fallen to the floor. Looking down at her was Corn, the fairy prince from her childhood! In the soft light from the lamp and fridge, the connection was striking. He was smiling so brilliantly at her, as if his eyes really were seeing the girl he loved. And what eyes they were! Gems, she'd thought so long ago. Even his shirt billowed from a breeze off the balcony, like wings fluttering behind him. Yes. This was right. Ren could be Corn for her and she would be whoever it was that Ren loved... and tomorrow, he wouldn't remember any of it. She reached up to guide his lips to hers and lost herself in the silken feel of him.


	4. Chapter 3

I don't own Skip!Beat, nor the characters in this fan fic. This is just for the viewing pleasure of fans and not for profit.

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It's a good thing this was only a fantasy, Ren decided. Otherwise, he would've been embarrassed by his own drunken clumsiness. While it wasn't all elbows and awkwardness, like his first forays into sex had been, there were awkward elbows involved and she'd laughed at him when he got the zipper on her track suit stuck, kicked him by accident when he'd tried to help pull off her pants and then slid under the sheets and was staring at him- waiting- still clad in her underwear. Seriously? He shook his head to clear it before stalking across the small bed toward her. He hadn't made a good first impression.

Kyouko shrieked when Ren tore the sheet off the bed, instinctively pulling her knees up and covering her bra and panties with an arm across her chest and one hand "down there." Like a predator sensing wounded prey, his eyes narrowed and glinted in the dim light. Her heart thumped, breaking the quiet. She was sure he was going to rip her remaining clothes off and she was already burying her best sports bra in an imaginary lingerie funeral when he said, "Relax. I won't hurt you." His voice was low, soft and intense. He moved- almost- gracefully until he sat beside but keeping a bit away from her. One large hand rested on her bent knees. His movements seemed designed to keep her calm and she tried to do as he'd said but knowing his fingers were only inches from her underwear kept her tense.

"I want to worship you," he said as his hand slid slowly down her shin, caressing her calf briefly and then stroking her foot. Wait, she thought, my foot?! Was he that sauced? What could be sexy about a foot? He picked it up carefully, looking thoughtful, as if it were Cinderella's dainty slipper. His hands spread warmth as they moved and felt it all over, from the painted toes, along the pink underside and up to dimpled ankles.

Tickling didn't quite describe it... Kyouko thought tingling might, until he leaned over and gave her foot a kiss. His eyes never left hers and she was too stunned to yell at him. That part isn't clean, she wanted to scream, but nothing came out. After performing, she'd been drenched in sweat of course, so she'd showered before she went out with the boys, but still- that had been hours ago! He smiled his sultry smirk and his tongue came out to trace everywhere his fingers had just been. She almost did stop him then, her right hand stretched out with palm out, but just then his tongue found a spot between her big toe and the long toe beside it. It felt so naughty, slithering there and wrapping around the toe before taking it into his mouth and she finally did have to say something,

"Ahhhn!"

One hand flew over her mouth, horrified at how that had sounded. Was this how his real lover would've responded? That girl would be young, like Kyouko, and probably as inexperienced as Kyouko, but would she be so fully entranced by how he moved, open mouthed, along the side of her foot, unexpectedly biting her arch before soothing it and moving up the inside of her calf? Another sound escaped her filter, or was that three, by now? She wasn't sure what was expected of her. He didn't seem the least bit put off by her noises as he raised her foot higher and licked a line up the back of her calf to a spot behind her knee. She was trembling by the time he passed that spot and rested, with his face beside her knee cap, looking up at her, nuzzling the delicate skin on the inside of her thigh. She was still lost in his eyes, seductive charmer that he was! And now he reached for her left hand, the one splayed across her panties defensively.

This is it, she thought, tensing both protective arms. Her free leg inched slightly inward. He had control over the other and could've knocked her ass over teakettle if he'd wanted to; there was no way to balance and the pillow behind her would be no help. Instead, he rested her leg over one of his shoulders and gently leaned forward, putting a hand on her left shoulder. She looked from it to him questioningly. As if her ability to speak had been stolen away, words devolved into gasps and soft sounds as his fingertips traced a trail of goosebumps from her shoulder to her bicep, bicep to forearm and forearm down to wrist and then, the hand! The only real barrier between him and "it." She clenched her eyes shut, body as taut as a drum. Let it be quick, she thought!

Feathery touches tickled the back of her hand. That was all? Was this what she'd been afraid of? She was prepared to see this through to the end, to be his "girlfriend" - all the way! Yet he did nothing to move her hand or rip off her underwear and have his way with her. She felt... disappointed. One of her eyes blinked open and then the other. Ren was still looking at her, hooded eyes as calm as ever. He smiled once she was looking at him again.

"Good," he cooed and moved his touch back up her arm. His other hand squeezed her upright leg and gently set it on the bed next to him. What was good? Did this mean she was acting like his lover would? She looked for Corn in his face and, with that heavenly smile aimed right at her, it was easier than ever to find. Her fairy prince had a rounder, more boyish face but it would've thinned out into something like his, she imagined. Surely a grown up Corn would be more handsome than a mere human, but Ren was handsome as well. Very handsome, in fact. Her shoulders relaxed. It eased her mind somewhat if she thought of this as both of them playing pretend. His smile grew wider and then came closer and closer. Feathery kisses graced her face, no longer so sloppy and drunken. When his tongue trailed along her jaw, she knew he had serious intent this time. A thrill ran down her spine.

"Is this a dream," he murmured to himself. His sly tongue was tracing the shell of her ear now, the light touch driving her crazy. "Is it," he repeated with some urgency and heat. It sounded rhetorical, but she couldn't form words to answer, even if it weren't. She managed a nod and he seemed content with that, sneaking a deep breath in her hair before saying, "Good." One of his hands cradled her neck while the other splayed across her back. A second later, there was a feeling of freedom as her restraining bra slipped off her shoulders.

"Wha-" her protest was swallowed by his kiss- deep and long. When they parted, he whispered, "I want to touch you, taste every inch of you." She couldn't meet his eyes, although her arms now encircled his neck and she'd somehow ended up with him leaning her into the pillow, her legs straddling his waist. Ren nuzzled the sides of her face, trying to get her to look at him. Giving up, he confessed to the crook of her neck, "I want you. Kyouko, please?"

She wished he wouldn't use her name! It made it so much more confusing, more difficult to keep up this girlfriend character, the facade she needed. Rather than answer, she turned her head away, arching her neck in invitation, moving her hands above her head in submission. He sighed, but didn't give her another NG, so she tried to relax and enjoy his tongue trailing once again. This time he was headed down her neck and, with stops only to kiss or press his teeth into her, he continued on toward her collarbone. Her breathing hitched and nearly stopped as he hit the hollow in her collarbone. He explored that area and his breath fanned southward; sensitive skin puckered in response and she was roused to try and rub her chest against him, seeking any friction she could get, although he was curled away from her, so that only her peaks brushed him, in a teasing way. Why was he so excessively tall?

Kyouko cried out in wordless need and then arched up and cried out again- this time in wordless thanks- as warmth and moisture and movement curled around her areola. One of his hands went behind her, supporting her efforts to push herself further into his mouth. His other kept her gasping, as it first cupped and then pinched, pulled, rolled and teased her other nipple until it, too was feeding her cries and causing her to writhe against him. His tongue moved in pulses, delicious suction and motion eliciting a deeper need within her.

"Mmmmm," she said. His lips! Teeth... "Ah!" Ren! More. Tongue, rubbing... There! More! She moved her hips downward, trying to increase contact with him- anything! More! Corn! Her keening rose in pitch and his rhythm increased, the hand on her back flexing into her muscles in a demand she didn't understand. "Mo-" She covered her mouth, biting her fist to keep her thoughts from tumbling out.

Her passivity unnerved him. He moved his hands to give her more support and brought her upright as he redoubled the onslaught of pleasure to her breasts. Her breathing changed to panting and then her panting tried to form words. Ren moved her up and down his abdomen, adding to the friction. Her thigh muscles tensed where they circled his waist. He shifted his arms, allowing his left to take the weight across her back and freeing up his right to travel around to the front and down.

"Yes! More... Ren... I want... Ah! Co-" Kyouko gasped and opened her eyes in shock. This was it! Part of her was scared- it wanted to crawl away- but the rest of her was fighting to throw him down and take what she wanted! She looked down, to the mess of black hair that moved along her chest and then into the sultry, dilated eyes that looked up at her, his mouth just now letting go of a pink nipple, an audible noise adding to the decadence. His hand took that moment to breach the white fabric and push it aside, exposing the last of her heated skin to the cool air in the room.

Kyouko stilled. Was this it?

Light touches circled, dipping in only to spread the natural fluids around. Ren reigned in his own needs to focus on her reaching hers. He took her mouth, which she'd left open in shock. Gentle, gentle touches. He traced her labia, spreading them, then ghosting along the exposed soft skin up and down slowly; his mouth mirrored this approach, melting her defenses, swallowing her surprised squeals. Her breathing was becoming more and more frantic between kisses and his fingertips were gliding easily along slick and slippery skin. Still, it meant nothing if he couldn't break through this strangely submissive shell! He wanted her to want this as much as he did and he'd been wanting it since before Dark Moon. She'd become this obsession, without even trying. If this was a "first time" fantasy, he wanted it to be mind blowing. He looked fondly on her open, panting mouth- red lips with a trace of saliva from where he'd trailed his tongue as he left it only seconds ago- and her hair- framing a beautiful, wanton face, glistening with sweat. Her body ground down on his hand, spasming as she begged him for more. This was his Kyouko! There was no way that bastard Sho could ever bring her to this!

"Aaah!" she cried out and grimaced. Ren stopped, realizing two of his fingers were now firmly seated inside her, knuckles deep. Gently, with soothing words, he tried to kiss her, but she bit his lower lip. "Just do it!" she hissed.

His playboy smile widened as she kissed the lip she'd hurt. So his kitten could bite? He wanted to make her do far more than that!

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Sorry, this has grown longer (surprise!) than I expected and our characters were being difficult about falling into bed for me, so it's been a while. If this is deemed too graphic, I'll happily take it down and move over to aff or a similar venue. Feel free to let me know or just... REVIEW!


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4, as it were. I don't own Skip!Beat, nor the characters in this fan fic. This is just for the viewing pleasure of fans and not for profit.

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Pain blossomed as Ren's body demanded the wages for a night of hard drinking.

"Ngaaah," he moaned lowly, not willing to open his eyes, yet with an increasing awareness of the level of light in the room around him. If there was ever a day to play the spoiled brat actor and cancel his work, today was it! Cocooned in a blanket, Cain Heel style, Ren knew he wouldn't do that, not for real. That was Cain's way, not Ren's. Plus, his bladder wasn't going to let him stay in bed for much longer. That certainty and a churning stomach were probably what woke him up. There was a roaring in his ears and his head felt as if it had been stuffed with cotton wadding. Painfully. Trying to move caused a new outbreak of groaning to start up. Everything hurt: his head, back, chest, stomach, every muscle in his thighs and, strangely, the palms of his hands. "Crap."

He curled up on himself, hoping to delay the moment when he had to stand, probably just to fall and end up crawling to the shitter. It had been a long time since he'd had that heavy a binge. What the hell was I... oh, vodka. A whole range of hard liquors, in fact. He had a high tolerance, having drunk alcohol from a young age, but combined, they'd wipe even him out. Not for long, he hoped. Should be okay by mid day or so. But, why?

A hot burst of emotion hit him and passed, like a wave of nausea. Oh, right. He grit his teeth. Anger. Loneliness. Vodka. Whiskey. A bad combination, no matter how you cut it. Still, he felt more like he'd been on the losing end of cage match with a tiger than simply hung over! The roaring in his head died down slightly and then cut off. There was still noise in his mind, but it didn't sound like a waterfall anymore. Waterfall? Damn, he had to pee. Probably deal with the erection at the same time, then. With his eyes still tightly closed, Ren reached for the edge of the blanket he was trapped in and-

Click.

Ren froze at the sound, hand fisted in the cover by his waist. He wasn't alone in the hotel room.

Pause.

Creeeeak. The bathroom door, he realized.

Pause.

Did he go out and pick someone up last night?

The hushed sound of feet pattering across the room was followed by a rustle of fabric. A fragrant draft of humid air wafted over to him. He'd recognize that scent anywhere. There was a scurrying noise and then- silence again. It seemed that every one of the small mammal's movements was followed by a pause; was she checking to see if he'd woken? Suddenly, the exaggerated sound of a metal lock sliding resounded in his mind before an even louder creak. Why did he feel the need to stay still? She was the one acting sneaky, and yet, he was hiding.

He just couldn't face her. Like a fool, he'd gotten drunk last night. Kyouko shouldn't have to see the aftermath. He stayed there, like a gigantic, blanket burrito, until the echo of the door re-latching had stopped ringing through his head. She'd left. It was morning, so she'd likely gone to get prepped for her role as Setsu Heel. If he was going to make it to the bathroom with any semblance of dignity, he had to do it while she was gone.

Moving brought the expected, but not welcomed, cavalcade of pain. Standing tripled the pounding in his head and brought up a new question. Why was he sleeping in damp, leather pants, peeled down to his thighs? His hard on seemed unfazed by this question and probably appreciated the freedom, but...

Taking stock of his mostly nude body, Ren was confused by red lines that threaded their way from his shoulders down muscles he'd spent countless hours sculpting in his gym, especially this last year, with the added sexual frustrations to work off. These scratches weren't deep, but he had to puzzle them out as he staggered onward. They went all the way down to the tender skin by his hip bones and from there he saw traces of half moon divots on his thighs. There was a faint scent of sweat on his skin and in the room... sex? Knees turning to jelly, his skin remembered the feel of soft hands- everywhere- nails teasing him, fingernails digging into flesh. Gasping, Ren fell to the carpeted floor, cradling his head as nausea swept through his system again.

No! She couldn't have... Her cries; the feeling of hair against his stomach as her little mouth tried to take him in; his hair being pulled as she... Why the hell would- glimpses, images, bursts of sound assailed him, and he groaned, trying to hold the bile back. He'd wanted to fuck her so badly... Slowly, fantasies or memories flashed in postcard-type snapshots; he crawled his way into the bathroom.

There was he was, standing next to the bed, fumbling with Cain's giant belt buckle. She's laughing, but he doesn't mind. Damn pants never cooperated, either. Then a moment of clarity as he nudged her entrance and confessed his love for her. She'd shushed him with her fingers in his mouth and his conscience went numb. Blackness, holes in his memory. The next feeling was one of pure bliss, being fully seated inside her, finally, holding her and kissing her as their bodies became one. He'd told her how wonderful she was, how she made him feel. Then, joined flesh: moving, sliding, rocking... failing? Ah, that was when she'd taken matters into her own hands- er, mouth. Was it the alcohol? Was it the tears he'd kissed away from her cheek? She'd sworn he wasn't hurting her, but his worry could've effected his performance and he'd recalled thinking it was over. But she'd... The sight of her... her hands, her lips... so sweet. She'd fumbled as much as he had and yet... he'd pulled her back just in time. The mess he'd made was cleaned up easily with her sheets.

That was then. Now this memory, along with the contents of his stomach, were assaulting his senses.

He rested his cheek on the cool, porcelain floor tiles, stomach empty, but no happier. There was a memory of looking down on her beautiful face one moment and then being on his back the next, a wanton goddess riding him as his hands held her up, fingernails digging into his shoulders. Grinning wildly up at her, Kuon had encouraged her, selfishly taking anything she was willing to give him.

Self reflection did little good, but he'd long known that the reason he couldn't keep a girl back when he'd been Kuon was that he threw himself into each relationship, demanding so much and clinging, like a child. The character of Ren was drawn from the opposite of his true self but, he too couldn't hold a relationship for long. Ren didn't demand anything from his girls. Tsuruga's exes felt unloved, disappointed. He had trouble showing passion, for fear of hurting or pushing them away. No, it was true that neither part of him deserved love, but that was never a danger until her... and now... How many times had his drunken mouth told her that he loved her? God, if that was only the worst he'd done... worst he'd said.

"Corn," she'd shouted as he took her in the shower. Was she imagining their time at Hamburger Rock, only as adults now? He smiled as he remembered it. He'd been behind her, knees bent and thighs slamming against her ass. He remembered being close to his release and she was calling that name in a voice rich with lust. "Corn!" Her knees trembled and she leaned back into his chest. He held her hips up, teeth on the shell of her ear, pushing in and out as his pleasure built.

"Call my name," he'd rasped into her hair and she'd licked her lips, dry despite the shower pouring down on them both. "Say it again," he begged, slowing his thrusts. She glared at him over one shoulder. Cheeky girl!

"Tsu-ru-ga," she'd sung and her weak fists batted at him to speed up.

"Wrong."

A whimper and she shook her hips, moving him from side to side as he pulled out of her, all except his tip. Exquisite! "Ren," she pleaded. He bit back a moan.

"Wrong. I'm starting to wonder if you want this at all."

"You're- Ah! Mmm! No! Ssstop, teasssing- Ung..." Fingertips slid through her folds, flitting inside and out. Her hips ground down, but he kept his touch light until, "Corn?" This memory faded to black, like the rest.

It was enough to make him sick now. And it did. Several times.

He rinsed him mouth after pulling himself up to the sink. Hazel eyes widened at his reflection. What had he done! Poor Kyouko! She had to hate him! No wonder she'd snuck out this morning! So quiet, trying not to awaken the monster he was last night...

He glared at the reflected shower. How long ago had he held her there? Soap bubbles glistened in the early glow of dawn as he'd held her. He looked at his hands, flexing them as he remembered her slick ass, gripped tightly, her core grinding against him, ready to go again. There was nothing more. A fragment of a memory. His body knew more than he did and the aching spoke volumes. How many times? How did he get to bed? If he was going to burn in hell, he wanted to remember his sins, dammit! Ren's fists hit the sink, rattling the fixtures.

"Big brother?" her voice called out as the front door opened and he gave a panicked look at the bathroom door. Closed. Thank goodness. How would he face her now?


End file.
